Category Archives: home buying

Moving Forward… Stalled

Argh. I’m trying to initiate some life changes and it’s not working. Try, try again.

Before I talk about that, let me first stay that my Crush Attack from my previous post has been my own personal roller coaster ride that has gone something like this:

He’s cute. I wonder if he likes me. I bet he thinks I’m cute. He’s never been married. He doesn’t have kids. He must be immature. He sucks. I’m stupid for even thinking about him like that. We work together. He called me today and sounded cute. Maybe we’ll live together some day. How stupid is that? I wonder if he’s selfish? Maybe he’s actually a nice guy? I wonder if his family is nice. This is never gonna work.

Am I 15 again or what?

Jeezuz, make the thoughts just stop. This has been going on for a month now and I haven’t seen him since the company Christmas party. How stupid.

Anyhow, onto other life developments… I put an offer on a house today. There was another offer. I lost. I countered. I lost that one too.

Frustration at its finest.

This house was great. It was move-in ready. I am move-in ready. We’d go great together.

My real estate agent sucks. I know this. I went to see 4 houses with him today and I wanted to ditch him at each one. He is not the proactive variety and he moves at the pace of a snail. The offer process on this house went something like this:

Initial Offer

Him: The original offer was a “strong” offer. Let’s offer $XX, which amounted to $100 over asking.

Me: No, let’s offer at least $1,000 to $2,000 over asking.

Him (after submitting offer): They took the other offer.

Me thinking: No shit.

Counter Offer

Me: I’ll go up $4,000 plus pay half of the closing costs.

Him: Okay

Him (after submitting offer): It’s not high enough. Do you want to go up by $5K more?

Me: NO!

_______________

Then he came back and wanted to know if I wanted to put an offer on a previous house that I looked at earlier in the day. I told him to get me the one I wanted.

No, he’s not getting guaranteed commission today by defaulting me to second best. He failed. I need a new realtor. I’ve had him since September and not once has he proactively sent me any properties. He’ll send me properties after I’ve sent him some that I like. Then he’ll say “what about this one too?”

Bare minimum effort. I’m done with that.

If something falls through with this house that I put an offer on, I’ll have to use him if I want it.

Otherwise, I need to think through my next move. The current state of my real estate situation is not working. I am not doing this.

Stifle Me Not

Settle Me Not

My home-buying search has begun.

I forgot how frustrating home-buying can be.

There’s all of the “what-ifs” and “what about this…” or “that”… it’s a game of speculation and daydreaming and giving yourself regular reality checks. I love it and hate it all at the same time. I’m limited to a set amount I can spend. Sure, I can spend more, but then have I learned anything in the past 20 years since I’ve reached adulthood?

No.

And if you don’t learn your damn life lessons, then where does that leave you?

Yep, sure as shit, back at the beginning of the damn lesson. Karma 101.

I’m not sure that my realtor is doing a damn thing. If I send him a property, he’ll act on it and get me in to see it, but it appears he’s not watching the market for me. Maybe he is and the market sucks. It’s hard to tell. Plus it’s fall, so the housing market, well, sucks for buyers. I do what I can to be proactive, but I have this thing called a job that I go to everyday and its sucking the damn life out of  me. Then I have my kids in the evening, and well that’s a whole other form of life-sucking. One kid (the 4 year old) is up my butt half the time – to the point where I’m tripping over him – and the other kid (the 10-year old) hides in her room of filth and I have to pry her out to eat dinner and make sure she’s not turning into a screen time zombie.

I need a house so I can be comfortable in my life again. I’m so sick of being a guest of unwelcome messiness in my dad’s house. But at the same time, the freedom of not having a mortgage is pretty great. Although, I’m strapping myself with continuing to save for my down payment. I just want the cycle to end where I can be in a little budget and live.

I love the crazy self-talk you go through when you start shopping for a house. I saw 3 houses on my first searching day. I crazily thought that it was possible for one of them to be “the one”. Then I anxiously went to see the fourth one. It was nice and I still didn’t like it. That’s when I realized I have more an idea of what I want than I realize. The fifth house was in scary shape. The sixth house was also very nice, but it wasn’t me, and it was too much space to take care of. Yep, six houses, with half of them being pretty nice, and none of them pleased me. I’m going to be a hard one to impress.

But that little nagging voice inside keeps saying “don’t settle. Don’t Settle. DON’T SETTLE!!!!”

I won’t settle for a house I don’t love. And I won’t settle for a man who doesn’t love me.

Not that man-hunting has even been occurring. I peek out from behind the sidelines. I have no desire (other than an occasional side glance out the car window) to do any form of dating. At least with home buying its all about me and my family’s needs. Dating sounds like some kind of journey to another foreign land to me right now.

So I’m going to get some rest and spend another few weeks being hopeful with the housing market. Not sure that I can pull off a house by Christmas, but that’s the hope.

I’ll just keep on going. Not settling sounds like a good goal to have. It’s not like I’ve been overly picky my whole life.

Stifle Me Not